Public service announcement

For the time being, this blog is on hiatus.

Thank you for visiting nevertheless. Likely, there will be a glorious return in one form or another sooner or later.

Love, P.

Weekend Jam: The Bangles - Be With You

I had heard songs like Eternal Flame or Walk Like An Egyptian before but it really wasn't until Gilmore Girls that I really realised there was this band called The Bangles. And suddenly I was in love. And when I'm in love, I'm obsessed. I wanted to know everything there was to know. I wanted to hear every song there was to hear and see every picture and watch video there was to see or watch. The latter was quite easily done: there barely weren't any. It was the time before YouTube but from the band's official site you could see all the music videos and maybe some live ones, too. The quality wasn't too good, mostly very grainy and the biggest size option was about the same as the small video below.

But I watched them religiously. I loved them together and individually. Vicki Peterson played the guitar so well and I thought it was the best that she had her sister Debbi Peterson in the same band. I thought Michael Steele was definitely the coolest and Susanna Hoffs gave me feels that weren't entirely heterosexual. I remember thinking that when watching this video for one of my favourite songs, Be With You. The lead is sung by Debbi which leaves a lot of time for the ones in the front to give their all. And they really do: they're wild. Check out Susanna doing splits while playing the guitar around 0:54 an the glaces she gives at the camera in the end. Thank you Susanna for helping me figure these things out. And thanks to this entire band for being an inspiration to my own playing.

 

Be With You from 1988.

Weekend Jam: Björk – All Is Full Of Love

Hello for the longest time! It's been the time for the summer vacation which lead to to this unwarned and also a bit of an unplanned radio silence. But now it's time to boogie again! Although not literary, this time at least. Today I'm mostly inspired by a friend whose wedding I attended this weekend. The party was indeed full of love and the bride and I had a chance to go to a long-awaited Björk concert a few years ago. Hence this modern classic:

 

Love is love.

Moretz and Stewart and Binoche – oh my!

There's this upcoming film called Clouds of Sils Maria. And it is giving me dome serious feels. I had seen a bunch of behind the scenes photos and some red carpet ones from Cannes. I was intrigued of course: it stars Chloë Grace Moretz (whom I find interesting), Kristen Stewart (whom every young gay seems to be crushing on and who does, yes let's admit it, have a special place in my heart, too, because when I was younger Safety of Objects was such an important film to me and she plays a gender bending preteen in it, and also because she really is pretty hot) and the crazy attractive and talented Juliette Binoche.

PLEASE.

But it was the trailer that got me pretty much rolling on the floor. (Because. You'll see if you haven't already.) In the film a successful actor (Binoche) is asked to be in a movie based a play that made her famous. Only that then she played the young girl and now she's to play the less flattering role of the older woman. So she becomes haunted by her past and gets obsessed with the girl playing the part (Moretz). And there definitely is a Certain Vibe between her and her assistant (Stewart). Oh what a time to be alive and a gay movie buff! The fore mentioned trailer:

 

Can't. Wait.

Weekend super jam: ABBA

For the lack of any jams last week and it being already Sunday, I decided to make it up by a super jam. Which means basically that I will ramble on a bit more than usually. And there are three songs. Mainly because I felt I have to set myself a limit so that it wouldn't be too exhausting for a random reader.

I've come to realise not everyone loves ABBA. There's nothing everyone loves but ABBA seems to be rather polarising. For me they've kind of always existed. It's something you don't really form any opinion on or live without. Like air. Or water. Or maybe something less vital, but to be honest I don't want to imagine my life without it. I had always kind of known and heard them and when I started to get more into music, around the age of twelve or so, ABBA became my favourite band. Maybe because I had a friend whose parents had a nice record collection she could make use of. Later on we found a ton of other stuff but ABBA was a nice stepping stone to what we saw as an adult music world (we took it rather literally for we started to listen to music mainly adults did).

Like always with all my big interests, I became rather obsessive. This being time before really having an access to the Internet just like that and the Internet actually functioning the way it does today, there were basically only the albums, a concert I had taped on VHS on TV and some random pictures. We were somewhat boy crazy at the time so we were kind of bummed the guys in the band didn't really seem that attractive to us. So we poured all our love for the women. Because both, Frida and Agnetha were divine.

We were constantly dishing on which had a better voice, who had better outfits (well, some times it was a choice of less awful), who was more beautiful and who we would rather be. Probably more likely which one we would rather marry, given that we were pretty much in love with them and despite then acute boy craziness, both ended up playing more or less for the other team. It was a bit problematic actually, because we both preferred Frida. She was brunette. She was a good dancer. She had a really sweet smile, her voice was lower and she could draw really well (in some CD booklet there were some drawings). If we were belting Winner Takes It All from the bottom of our hearts in the school day afternoons and pretending to be them, we would take turns in being Frida and Agnetha as both wanted to be Frida and neither was really a blond nor a brunette (I really looked most like Björn to be honest). I would wear my mother's old embroided blouse and we would totally do the singing into different directions. Like this:

Frida looked so beautiful here we would have lengthy discussions on it.

Let's fast forward to 2008 when Mamma Mia!, the film, came out. (That itself is such a triumph of older women that I won't even go there.) But after I'd seen it I really wanted to take a trip down the memory lane and fangirl like I had years earlier. And now I could have a nice YouTube session and watch stuff I hadn't seen before! So I ran into this some performance that was kind of... an eye opener. I'd always been a Frida-girl and I had never felt any need to reconsider choices I made in my early teens. But then I watched this video and I suddenly I got what all the fuss on Agnetha was about. I mean Frida's super hot here, too, but there's just something that made me want to take a chance on Agnetha in the heartbeat. Maybe it's the boots and the blazer. Maybe it's the way she moves. Or actually it probably is the way she looks at the camera when singing ”'cos you know I've got / so much that I wanna do / when I dream I'm alone with you”.

Like, please tell me more Agnetha!
(I apologise for the poor quality but it's the best I coud find.)

I may not be that hardcore with my fanatic feelings nowadays but still my heart really beats to the rhythm of golden pop/disco tunes from the 70's. So let's end this with this rather... shall we say interesting, video for my favourite ABBA song, Eagle. And these super adorable gifs. Because you probably could see it coming: I ship it!

 

  Jeez. (Gif credit.)

Things you should see: Féminin/Féminin

If a show is done by a bunch like this, you know you want to see it.

I've stated it before: I am a sucker for anything at all with gay content. And I've learnt to accept that the quality often leaves a lot to wish for. So it's such a thrill to find things done with true passion. Féminin/Féminin is one of those.

The adorable web series has eight about ten minute long episodes and each of them focuses on a person/couple. Which is pretty brilliant: I can't even decide who my favourite is. I guess it was whoever was on the focus of the episode. Which is always a sign of something done right.

Féminin/Féminin revolves around a group of twenty-something lesbian friends and it offers pretty much everything you can wish for: comedy, drama, this documentary feel as the characters are interviewed in each episode, good looking people, somewhat realistic feel. Also, there's this relationship between a younger and older woman. Which I always appreciate.

The first episode came out almost six months ago and the rest now in June. And the best thing is that you can watch it free online. The series sets in Quebec so it's French Canadian but don't worry if your French isn't that good or is rather non-existent (like mine): it's subtitled in English.

I really don't even want to write more to keep you from watching it. It's good, cute and it doesn't even take that long to binge watch. So go do it now! Here's a link. And if you like it spread the word. You can also donate if you feel like it so there's going to be more to watch!

Keep on the sunny side

I like to think myself as a positive person. Everything is possible and in the end it is going to be okay. I enjoy the little things in life, see good in every situation and like to concentrate on the positive side of things. There's nothing more attractive in a person than being enthusiastic and passionate and being open to everything life has to offer. This comes to me naturally: I've always been an idealist and some may find it naive.

But I truly madly deeply believe that despite of everything, people are still inherently good and everyone deserves at least that famous second chance. Each and everyone has potential: they deserve everything good that life has to offer. Except for one person. Whom no one can actually like, let alone love. And if something good happens to them they most definitely didn't, well first of all deserve it, but also they didn't work for it – it just happens. Like that one The Smiths song (or pretty much all of them, but let's use just one as an example in this case): "you just haven't earned it yet, baby / you must suffer and cry for a longer time". That's exactly how I feel what this person should do: suffer and cry just a little bit more. And yes, that person is me.

I know it makes no sense. That I think the most notorious tyrants must have had some nice qualities about them but I am like a spawn of Satan. Well, actually for the most of the time I see myself as a good person who never litters, says thank you, is nice to everyone, who keeps the door open for others, who's easy-going and always ready to support others. But it's still there, somewhere in the back of my head. It's a constant project, to try to let go of these poisonous ideas. It's not good for you. I try to think it's way better than being mean to others but then again you spend time with yourself 24/7 so I wouldn't be so sure.

I try to learn from the masters: from the people that ooze positive energy. I don't think reading some self-help book by a random person you've never seen or heard of would make much of a difference for me. I look up for those I kind of know already, those to whom it comes naturally and who seem to live how they preach. Like Amy Poehler. I wouldn't be as sunny and bubbly even if I got rid of these ideas but how can I claim to be a positive person if everything I say to believe in applies to everyone else except for the one you're supposed to love the most? I recently posted this gif set on Tumblr:

  

No truer words have been said. Really. But life's all about learning and self-improvement, right? Like said, you're never too late to late to learn new things. Like a little self love. I  should probably start my days by chanting the latter part of the send gif as an affirmation. Since we're on the topic of how inspirational Amy Poehler is in so many ways, let's watch this video, too.

 

And as I really want to take this more into the direction of some inspirational words and how you, too, deserve a bit more love in your life, especially from yourself and about general gushing about Amy, can I just point out here at the end, how much I want this book by her to be out like now. Or yesterday. Yes please, indeed.

 

Weekend Jam: Neneh Cherry – Blank Project

Since I've been pretty much stuck in the past for some time with the Weekend Jams, for a change there's a pick from an album that came out this year. Wow, I even impress myself!. Anyhow, Neneh Cherry published her first solo album for almost 20 years this February. It's pretty fab.  And as of late I've felt this album, Black Project, is musically exactly what I need in my life. Highly recommending it to, well pretty much everyone.

 

Neneh Cherry perforning title track from the new album on  Later... with Jools Holland.

Weekend Jam: Patsy Cline – I Fall To Pieces

I am yet again acquainted with my old friend unrequited love! It's still kind of on early stage: that I totally obsess over her and even though I know this will lead to pain and misery and tears, I don't care. Because I want to believe there's always hope. Except when there's not. Like now, probably. Sigh. Nevertheless, I have found some comfort in some tunes revolving around this favourite topic of mine. Patsy Cline has been one of my metaphorical shoulders to cry on when I get hit in the face with this boring thing called realism.

Patsy Cline on The Glenn Reeves Show in 1963.

Praise the tummy, Nigella

There's something I love and it's curvy women. Well, I love very many kind of women but I do think Nigella has one of the most beautiful figures out there. And the best of it all, she looks radiant, healthy and charismatic. Such a beauty. I know she has had difficulties in her life and with the press in the past few years but I can only wish her the best.

I used to have a habit to watch her show while eating because I had problems with my appetite. She always helped because she just makes cooking and eating seem so enjoyable. I still love watching her to cook or to talk or just pretty much to do anything. Her lovely British accent just makes it all pretty much perfect.

Have you ever seen a woman making love with what she's cooking? Just go to Youtube, type "Nigella Lawson chocolate" and you'll see.

Weekend Jam: Madonna - American Pie

I've been working this weekend (something I really don't usually do) and my head just really feels like a balloon. So I'll just keep this simple and cute this time and introduce you one more video by Madonna. Let's just keep this as an example of my mind when I'm extremely exhausted. There's one little sweet detail in this video I really like. Try to guess which one? I think I need some candy now but I'm too tired to move anywhere.

Oh, Susan

I found it hard to concentrate on anything (there's too much exciting things going on in my life at the moment) so I ended up with spending some time with one of my favorite ladies.

Oh Susan, what have you done to me. Gorgeous lady is gorgeous. I could listen to you speak for days. And what makes it even more better, you always seem to have something meaningful and witty to say.

And I love the way your curls descend and frame your face. I love your personality and your smile. I really just feel like writing haikus to praise your gorgeousness...

I'm trying to figure out what makes this video so hot. Probably her working out… is she doing Pilates or something similar? She seems so laid-back and relaxed in a way. I also don't mind her her talking about lesbian vampires. But to be honest, she could talk about anything and I'd listen.

Okay, I'll stop before I start sounding a bit creepy. But I just really love her and she has inspired me so much. She's also one of the hottest ladies out there, period.

Weekend Jam: Dusty Springfield – I Only Want To Be With You

I've been having so surprisingly action packed weekend: so much so that I forgot the entire Weekend Jam! As my quick pick, here's one of my all time favourite feelgood songs. 

I've absolutely loved Dusty Springfield for ages and in the more gay years of my life I've found this even deeper interest towards her: not only was she a tragic and troubled artist (which always fascinates me) but she mainly had relationships with women. Gives a whole new level to upbeat pop song from 1963 where one only wants to be with the certain person. Sweet! So let's have a quick dance party here at the end of the weekend to Dusty's first hit!

For your eyes only: Bond girls & such

I said I would and so I will. Combine my love for the Bond films and blogging, that is. But after all, I decided to keep it short and just write one mega entry instead of several ones. I have a tendency to get a bit carried away whenever I get to talk about things I love, so consider yourselves warned.

First of all, let me start by pointing out that I get how the entire concept of Bond girls can be seen as problematic and I'd be more that willing to give it a little twist. People could really get more creative with the casting! How about even a someone bit older for starters? Or like for instance, my favourite time of the year, aka the Eurovision song contest, was the best one for years really. Mainly because of Conchita Wurst. The winning song, Rise Like A Phoenix, sounds like a Bond theme – the name and the melody – and Conchita would be a dashing Bond girl if you ask me. I mean, come on: how is this not perfect in every possible way?!
 
Besides, in Skyfall, the villain Raoul Silva has James Bond tied to a chair: he's caressing him and saying how there's always a first time for everything. To which James replies with ”What makes you think this is my first time?”. Maybe just keeping it cool, maybe not. I wouldn't be surprised though.

Anyway, the girls: so basically there are two types of women in the Bond films. The ones that don't end up messing with James and the ones that do. The ones that don't include the secretary Miss Moneypenny who for 23 years was played by Lois Maxwell. It was never quite clear whether their constant flirt was as harmless in her viewpoint than it was from James' (likely not) but I definitely liked her character. In 1987 Maxwell was replaced by a 26-year-old Caroline Bliss and in the Brosnan era she was played by Samantha Bond (talk about a fitting name). The latest, Skyfall, is one of my absolute favorites in the fim series and I was so jazzed to get another Moneypenny for whom I totally fell for and look forward to seeing more of her! And then there's my all time favourite character M, who became that once Judi Dench was casted. Basically she's James Bond's boss and made her first appearance in 1995 in Pierce Brosnan's first film. I definitely enjoyed their chemistry. Daniel Craig hasn't kept the flirting game going that strong so there's been a slight shift in that relationship during his time but I love it none the less. Especially in Skyfall.

Lois Maxwell as Miss Moneypenny and Judi Dench as M.

But well, I guess its' about the time we get to the business and talk about that other lot, the actual Bond girls. I've made a top seven of my favourites. Mainly because, not that I don't like the others or find them gorgeous, I didn't want there to be any fillers. These seven are the best of the best and I love them dearly. For me being a perfect Bond girls isn't so much about the looks: it really is the personality and the ability to kick some ass that makes me swoon. And also I apparently do have a tendency to fall for somewhat tragic characters. 

7. Anya Amasova (Barbara Bach)

The Spy Who Loved Me, 1977

Anya Amasova also goes by the name XXX: she's a Soviet spy who's originally against James and what he stands for. For example she has no problem whatsoever to leave him passed out in some random desert if it means she can gain from it. However since they both are after the same dude it turns out to be more efficient to work side by side. And a bit more that that actually... But nevertheless Anya Amasova is a capable woman and not some poor little creature: don't let her sweet looks fool you! 

6. Octavia "Octopussy" Charlotte Smythe (Maud Adams)

Octopussy, 1983

Maude Adams made a pretty forgettable appearance in a Bond film nine years earlier but she returned in quite a spectacular way! Because oh Octavia! She has an island only for women where she describes these women share some sisterly love. Yeah right. In addition to this pretty titillating island she has a circus and an octopus. That's my kind of a girl! Also, I am totally into that how she's not a goody good kind of a person but a diamond smuggler and a cool headed business woman.  

5. May Day (Grace Jones)
A View To a Kill, 1985

May Day is a woman of a few words but she makes it up with her impeccable sense of style and inhuman strength that makes her throw her enemies literally out of the way. She's teamed up with the mean guy which makes it pretty awkward that she hooks up with James, too, but whatever. Anyways, she's played by Grace Jones – does one need more reasons really. 

4. Teresa "Tracy" Draco aka Countess Teresa di Vicenzo (Diana Rigg)
On Her Majesty's Secret Service, 1969

Okay, let's make it clear: this in one of my favourite Bond films and I totally dig the sad love story! Tracy has a history and a deadwish and all these things make her way more interesting than most Bond girls out there. When she's first introducing herself she makes it clear: ”Teresa is a saint; I'm known as Tracy.” Also, Diana Rigg is Rachael Striling's mother. Like mother like daughter! Love them both.

3. Wai Lin (Michelle Yeoh)
Tomorrow Never Dies, 1997

Wai Lin is breathtakingly efficient spy who's also really skillfully mastered in combat sports. In the film they mainly toil in Wai Lin's comfort zones so she's really on top of James for most part (metaphorically, mainly, although probably in other ways, too). And like all my other fave Bond girls, she doesn't warm up to James just like that

2. Pussy Galore (Honor Blackman)
Goldfinger, 1964

Pussy Galore – well, not the best name out there. To be honest,  I did not expect much from a Bond girl named like that. But oh boy was I mistaken! Because Pussy Galore: what a cool cat. First of all, she's the oldest Bond girl having been 36 when filming (that really isn't much: for example Daniel Craig turned 46 this year and 35+ generally is that best age for women if you ask me!). Also, in the book version, Pussy Galore's a lesbian. In the film she falls for James just like they all will. But then again that's kind the the thing. Pussy Galore works for the bad guy, too, and she's a top pilot. Like her part namesake Octopussy, she also has a circus: a flying one. She leads a group of  female pilots. Sweet! 

1. Vesper Lynd (Eva Green)

Casino Royale, 2006

Oh Vesper! I don't even know what to say about you! First of all, Eva Green: one of the hottest women out there. And second of all: she as a tragic Bond girl you're not certain whether you can trust or not = LOVE. I was pleasantly surprised by this film altogether and I don't even know how many times I've seen it. Mainly because of Vesper/Eva. The character's interesting and she has some killer outfits, too.

I really tried to keep it short! You are welcome!

Weekend Jam: Siouxsie - These Boots Are Made For Walking

When I was a teenager, I had my goth-phase. I wore only black, I wore long black leather jackets, black boots and lots of eyeliner… I'll always remember how one little girl in the library started to cry when she noticed me. Needless to say, I'm grateful those days are long gone. But somehow I'm also a bit sad I didn't know Siouxsie back then, she'd surely had bring some class into my so called neverending darkness.

I love her attitude and I also love her voice. But the most I love the atmosphere of her music, specially with Siouxie and the Banshees. There's something magical and haunting in those tunes, something that I rarely listen to but when I do it's such an intense feeling. It brings strange kind of melancholic nostalgia into my heart.

I'm also wishing to point out she's actually around 54 years old in this performance. How breathtakingly amazing is that? Would I mind if she walked over me with those boots? Probably not.

Sarah Waters and her glorious storytelling

I've been sick all weekend so I've mostly just reading in bed. I read one book yesterday, it was rather good but not marvellous and I was left needing for more. Today I finally started reading Tipping The Velvet by Sarah Waters. God bless you Waters, such a wonderful, wonderful book. I remember dreaming about books like this when I was a teenager, world was so different back then. Waters describes all the little details of sapphic admiration and longing so beautifully, I can feel myself just holding my breath, at times like I was a part of the story. It's such a bittersweet feeling. I cherish every page of this novel, I truly do. I can only admire such talent she possesses. How she creates a new world, so vivid and full of life and all the little details.

It took me this long to get into this book because it hasn't been translated and I was a bit nervous to read it in English. I have read everything else from Waters and to be honest, I wish she'd go back to sapphic storytelling. I understand she wants to be diverse but this kind of novels are so rare and they matter so much to people like me. I'd be forever grateful if she wrote one more sapphic novel in the coming years. But I love her novels nevertheless, I see her as a literal genius, unique storyteller.

Tipping The Velvet must be my favorite of her novels, I've seen the TV mini-series adaption many times. It's wonderful. Needless to say, I'm really fond of Diana Lethaby and her relationship with Nan. I remember when I saw the series for the first time, I was nearly shocked. It felt like wathing all of my wildest dreams in a moving image... It was visually astounding, I loved the atmosphere, I fell for the characters. I feel the same when I'm reading the novel now. Everything comes alive in my eyes in such intense way it's almost too much for me. I think I'll go back to bed now and open the book again.

Weekend Jam: Grace Jones - Slave To The Rhythm

I think it will rather unevitable that at some point I shall combine my interest in this blogging thing and my love for the Bond films. In practice that will likely be in the form of listing my all time favourite Bond girls. Although in all honesty, that's kind of off topic regarding the older women theme: the oldest Bond girl was just under fourty years old. But well, that's not really my fault: I would definitely cast more mature women in most roles. But we'll see. Anyhow, I'm not puffing this possible series just randomly here for - spoiler! - one of my favourite Bond girls is played by our weekend jammer.

That being said, Grace Jones is above all a recording artist to me. And a style icon. Because I do appreciate dramatic outfits. I saw her live once and I almost peed my pants because of... oh so many reasons. It's not every day that you see a pretty scarcely and in somewhat eccentric way dressed woman in her 60s singing while hula hooping in front of you. Not that I wouldn't mind. And I surely didn't. The amount of cool pretty much had me paralysed. And also she freaks me out a bit. But that's definitely part of why she's so intriguing.

 

Grace Jones performing Slave To The Rhythm live in 2010.

Weekend Jam: Madonna - Like it Or Not

It feels a bit funny to realize I haven't yet posted anything Madonna-related. My love for her has started to fade a bit but she really meant a lot to me when I was a teenager. I could even call her one of the women who made me realize I'm gay. My love for her holds so many memories… I think I could just write a novel about them.

I'm not denying I'm kind of upset with the way she looks like nowadays. In my opinion, she worked out a bit too hard (lost too much weight) and it started to show on her face. Then she fixed it and at the same time it hid the way her face started to age naturally. It also upsets me to point these things out because even though I have mixed feelings about cosmetic surgery I do believe every woman has the right to decide about the things they wish do with their bodies. I'm not saying I'm judging Madonna here but I do praise the world of natural aging. I'm also kind of nervous what she'll end up looking like in a few years. But anyway, enough of this subject for now.

I have actually talked with Puppe a few times that I have hard time releasing my "can't handle the hot" posts here because deep inside I feel like I should actually write about something. But this time I'm just going to free myself because to be honest, these emotions are like building blocks of my heart. So many charismatic, gorgeous women! So little time! I have a friend who actually calls me a "woman lover" and she explained this very beautifully: "You see beauty in so many different kind of women and I admire that thing about you". So there, it's true. I'm a true woman lover. Now if only I had enough courage to ask some of these women out in real life. I'm going there… slowly. I have actually someone in mind right now. So I'm just wishing myself a lot of luck, again.

But to get back to the subject, I have so many memories of Madonna. It's intriguing when you're that connected to someone who's so popular, she's close and so far away at the same time. And by connection I mean that I've been intrigued and inspired by her for almost twenty years. That's a long time. When I was young, she guided me to discover new things about myself and I'm grateful for that. Something in her turns me off sometimes but something in her also moves me a lot.

Of her tours my favorite must be Confessions Tour. I love it so much that one of my friends, a gay boy, has actually disagreed to watch it with me sometimes because he can't always bear with the way I behave. But I just can't handle the hot. Like it or not, I really just can't handle the hot...

Like seriously, my dreams are made of this.

I'm a late bloomer, I am a slow learner

What is this that I hear and why haven't been up to this forever ago (which in this case is last July when pretty much all the news on the topic are dated)?! So, just yesterday I was gushing about Jennifer Jason Leigh and inspired by that I ended up doing some serious googling and Tumblr tag search and apparently she is to appear in an upcoming HBO series called Open. 

That alone is cool and all but there's more! Well, what could possibly make me all jazzed about this? Why yes, she IS playing a lesbian character. Also that character is in a love triangle with women played by Anna Torv and Michelle Monaghan. Is this the real life?! Is this just fantasy?! Why isn't there more information on this?! I have too many questions and too few answers?! I have too many sentences with question marks and exclamation points?!

What I've gathered is that apparently the series is about multiple main characters, the themes are relationships and sexuality, it's often described as being ”provocative”, it'll be on HBO and it's written be Ryan Murphy. Apparently the last fact gives people some Feels. I have given up on Glee ages ago so I really have no opinion on that but I've definitely enjoyed American Horror Story and the film Running with Scissors so I am quite pleased by this! Also gay people writing gay people = the best. So back to the questions: when will this happen?! Is it happening yet?! Can it please happen now?!

 Michelle Monaghan, Anna Torv & Jennifer Jason Leigh. Sweet dreams are made of this.

I kind of already ship Anna's character Windsor with both. Oh yeah and it seems that this Windsor is also yoga teacher. Say what?! Hearts in my eyes.

Weekend Jam: Marianne Faithfull - Hold On, Hold On

Last time when it was my turn to pick the Weekend Jam, we were listening to Neko Case. This week we are doing that again. Kind of. For my pick this time is Marianne Faithfull - covering a Neko Case song Hold On, Hold On. 

I definitely enjoy the original but honestly, I love this version even more. Marianne was almost thirty years older than Neko when recording the track and that's bound to give a certain touch to it. Even more so when that person has had more than enough life experience than maybe you ad me and everyone we know combined. When Marianne sings "compared to some I've been around/ but I really tried so hard" or "with a valium from the bride / it's the devil I love" it gives me shivers down my spine.

Marianne Faithfull in Later... with Jools Holland in 2009.

Weekend Jam: Santigold - Disparate Youth

It has been such a warm day today and it really finally feels like spring. I don't seem to get it as I put far too much clothes on again but I hope I'll soon realize that summer is actually coming! I have deep love for these first, sweet days of spring or should I already say, first days of summer. When I was thinking of a song that would remind me of last summer, this song came to my mind. It actually reminds me of last summer's midsummer's eve as I was listening to it back then.

I don't usually use these words but to me Santigold is the epitome of coolness. Unique, talented, intriguing. I also love her voice, it has this slightly melancholic touch. I know this song isn't exactly a happy party song but it still have this warm, a bit nostalgic feeling in it and it brings wonderful memories to my mind.

"I can get any woman away from any man."

 I've always loved so-called classic movie stars and their otherworldly, wondrous charisma. One of the first loves of my life was Marilyn Monroe when I was around seven years old. Then came Marlene Dietrich. I remember seeing her wearing a tuxedo in Marocco and it was truly love at first sight. I think I was around 12-13 at that time. Soon after that I discovered Greta Garbo and of these starlets I've loved her the most. She was mysterious, she was mystical, I related to her on some really special level. Her somehow reserved and eerie presence intrigued me. And she possessed otherworldly beauty I had never seen before.

I'll always remember the day I found out she and Marlene had been lovers. Imagine me including all the exclamation marks in the world here.

Now producer Megan Ellison is making yet-to-be titled TV series of these two also including other icons of the Golden Age of Hollywood like John Gilbert, Mercedes de Acosta, Tallulah Bankhead, Alla Nazimova, Barbara Stanwyck, Cary Grant and John Wayne. I sense a strong sapphic emotions coming this way as I know also De Acosta was involved with Garbo and Dietrich. I remember De Acosta's words "I can get any woman away from any man." I'm looking forward seeing that (and everything else I've just been visualizing in my dreams) dramatized for a small screen.

I'm also quite nervous. Garbo and Dietrich are such icons. Who will be playing them? Will I be content or disappointed? I'm naturally expecting a lot and even more. I can't really think of any modern movie stars who would remind me of them. You know the awkward and confusing feeling when someone you don't really have hots for plays someone who you've been head over heels in love with. It's always hard to portray someone who has been truly iconic. But on the other hand, I do remember Marion Cotillard as Edith Piaf. Actressess in roles like that are a blessing and give me hope. Let's wish for something similar for this project. 

Weekend Jam: Neko Case - Man

I first heard Neko Case's belting when encountering this one band very dear to my heart called The New Pornographers years and years ago. That was the gateway drug to the solo Neko material and hooked I got. Last year, Neko released her sixth studio album with a mighty long name and lyrics that are painfully raw and personal. I really liked it. A lot. And I finally got to see her live which was our first encounter for I'd actually only ever witnessed a light version of The New Pornos sans her.

On this 2013 release, The Worse Things Get, the Harder I Fight, the Harder I Fight, the More I Love You, there's a song called Man. In an interview Neko stated "I don't really think of myself specifically as a woman, you know? I'm kind of a critter. I'm an animal. Everyone's an animal. And I find I'm much happier and well-balanced if I think of myself that way because - - - if you were to look at a human creature as kind of a vase or something my glass is a little bit more full of the man stuff, than the woman stuff." Pretty refreshing, really.

And what we have here is (a slightly censored) live performance of Man from Austin City Limits.

Weekend Jam: Emmanuelle Seigner - Distant Lover

This video is a bit silly and I'd really just prefer her singing in french but Emmanuelle…

Oh, Emmanuelle... as your lover I'd never be distant.

Never, ever.

Reckless older women

Within about six months year I've seen three films made in 2013 revolving around the same theme and that I enjoyed a lot. That common theme is something you don't encounter every day. Bright Days Ahead, On My Way and Gloria concentrate on the so-called third act in a person's life. In a woman's life. Yeah, we all know Hollywood's obsessed with youth and like Tina Fey said in the Golden Globes monologue, Meryl Streep proves there are still great parts in Hollywood - for Meryl Streeps over sixty.

 But not everyone can be Meryl Streep. If it's generally worth mentioning that in some film there was a great role for a woman, a younger woman, there really can't be much to choose from for those in more mature state. This could be discussed on forever but I have no interest really. I have nothing to say that hasn't already been said. I mean, there' s a huge audience willing to go see films that speak to them on any level at all. And being in fifties nowadays is a whole different thing than being it in the say sixty years ago when you were gifted with a rocking chair and expected to be one foot in a grave. But I guess people reading this acknowledge that.

I loved Calendar Girls (2003) when I saw it in my teens. Whenever I re-watch Mamma Mia (2008) I come to realise I've forgotten that there are young people in it, too. I wish there were more films like Irina Palm (2007) or Elena (2011) out there. Films that show that these women are so much more than cardboard cutout mothers and grandmothers, looming in the shadows or in some supporting role. 

The three first mentioned, very recent films are basically light with comedic elements but aren't to be taken lightly. They show what sounds only reasonable but seems to be a hard one to get: that life doesn't stop when you get "old". In Bright Days Ahead Fanny Ardant's character retires and finds out she needs more in her life than mundane pottery classes. So she engages in an affair with a younger man. In On My Way, Catherine Deneuve's character takes an impromptu road trip and enjoys her new found freedom. Much like Paulina Garcia's Gloria in the movie of the same title.

These women have grown kids, they are finally free: probably for the first time ever and they can do whatever they please. So they get wild. They are the main characters I their own stories like one should be. They go out drinking. And - gasp - they have sex. This is something that I want to see, and being a person who always ends up seeing films where the average audience age is around fifty, my guess is all these people way closer the target age want to see those films, too. 

American Apparel had recently the 62-year-old Jacky O'Shaughnessy as an underwear model. Jessica Lange was just made the new face of Marc Jacobs Beauty. This is something that should happen more. These life stories that actually are life stories have so much to offer. People are willing to see and hear these stories it if they get a chance. I so hope this is the new thing. That there'll be more these films. From all over the world. Because there's really more going on out there than white able-bodied cis-gender heterosexuals who are conventionally good looking and in their 20's or 30's falling in love.

Albeit, being all for women not giving a hoot about anything at all and behaving kind of badly, it shouldn't be the only thing we see. Most women that age, or any age, don't end up giving hand jobs for money nor wake up alone on a beach wearing one shoe after a wild night out. Not every older woman should hook up with a younger person. If one does, they have every right to do so but all kinds of stories deserve to be told. Diversity is the key word. Yet again. But then again, the first pioneers need to clear the way for all these stories out there waiting to make it to the silver screen. And I for one don't mind; these reckless older women - boy do I love them!

Weekend Jam: The Raveonettes - Young And Cold

I am genuinely sorry for the lack of updates as of late. But for once in my life I have actually been kind of busy. Not really in the fun way, though. Springs are always weird. For some primitive reason they give me all these ambivalent feelings: I do love it, all the light, how even the rays of the early morning sun feel warm on your face and that the ice that was floating on the lake just last week has suddenly disappeared. But at the same time spring makes me restless and my life just seems to be over the place. I'm definitely sensing that in the air right now.

About exactly a year ago, there was a song that I found myself constantly singing along to and right now it speaks to me again. I don't know why. It does mention spring but in this spring time dust I'm not, for a change, loving anyone (in totally unrequited way) way too much. But my neighbours have definitely heard a rendition or two of the song for it's become my current guitar playing favourite. Fun fact or not, last year when I got myself a new guitar I almost picked the one Sharin is playing here. But didn't. So that wasn't really worth mentioning. But hey, let's finally listen to the song!

The Raveonettes playing Young And Cold live at RTL2.

Weekend Jam: Martha Wainwright - Proserpina

I wouldn't mind if Martha Wainwright was waiting for me at the gates of the paradise.

Martha is hell of a woman. I can't really even describe what makes her so attractive to me. There's something sensitive in her and it meets with something harsh and she just oozes sex all over the place. But to be more precise, she's also a strong and independent artist, sensual and captive performer and an amazing person overall. And she has a lovely, unique voice. Am I praising her enough?

She's also a perfect example why I love older women so much.

I had a lovely time trying to choose this jam. I could have gone on and on. I'm still going on and on.

If I was a typewriter I couldn't really do anything else at the moment except keep on pushing the keys s, e, x and y repeatedly and I'm not even sorry. 

Things you should see: Lip Service

 

Sam (Heather Peace), Sadie (Natasha O'Keeffe), Frankie (Ruta Gedmintas), Tess (Fiona Button), Cat (Laura Fraser), Lexy (Anna Skellern). Let's ignore the fact that for some mysterious reason Cat looks like a creepy wax figure here. 

First thing, Lip Service is a bit of old news and second thing, I probably wouldn't use "should" unless it was in the title of this series. But I felt inspired to write about this thing since I've been rewatched the series. I don't know why I thought that would be good idea. I wouldn't want anyone to became the emotional wreck I am at the moment so I'd be pretty cautious with this recommendation. Then again, if you're either a total TV junkie for anything involving gay ladies or someone who's gets a kick out of pain and suffering, well, then you've found exactly what you've been looking for! Congratulations. 

So for those, who missed the train the first time, Lip Service is a British drama series about friends living in Glasgow, Scotland. It was made between 2010 and 2012 for two series which equals twelve episodes. So it doesn't take much of your life to binge watch it. Time wise, that is. As all the main characters have serious lady loving tendencies, it's been compared to The L Word. Because hello, there really aren't any shows about lesbians but also maybe because the three main characters on series one kind of have The L Word counter parts. But Lip Service has more realistic touch. Could be that it's British, could be that there actually are straight people, too, could be that it feels culturally more familiar to me on personally level. Plot wise I wouldn't expect much more, though.

Basically both series revolve around love triangles (with mostly different people) and other stuff happens but I really didn't care for all the subplots that much the first time, let alone the second. And basically if one should compare for example fourth episode of each series one is left wondering if this even is the same show. But it's not bad really. I mean it's not like watching the Real L Word. Occasionally it's really good. And funny. Besides if you get emotionally involved with all the shipping, you're in for a hell of ride. I really didn't feel that strongly about any ship but that doesn't mean I weren't falling for certain characters are caring about what happened to them. In other words, yet again, I got way too involved emotionally.

In series one, I really loved Cat, although it was probably more Laura Fraser's face that I was attracted to than Cat's neurotic ways. The second series made me such an emotional mess for reasons I don't want to go into but you all who've been through what I have, know what I am talking about. I was iffy whether I should just ditch the entire show but there was a reason I couldn't. And the reason was Lexy Price. About everyone and their mother fell for Lexy, who came in as a new character on second series, and why wouldn't they; that was the character the show probably was missing earlier and it definitely lift it to whole another level. It definitely wasn't just Anna Skellern: Lexy was so dreamy she will likely remain among my most loved TV show characters until the end of time. Pretty much an actual dream girl that one.

But actually, no matter what's your type, you probably find a character to fall head over heels in love with. Or at least to identify with. And I personally value good personal chemistry among actors and feels the show gives me. Good writing is always a plus but then again one of my favourite TV shows is Rizzoli & Isles, so there's that. Oh, and also if you have a thing for accents, you're in luck. (That is unless it is the accent you have and you don't find it hot.) The show sets in Glasgow and if you ask me, the Scottish accent is the best of them all. Also, Anna Skellern's from Australia. Sweet! So there you go. Enter with caution and get ready to encounter all your emotions, probably during one single episode.